Posted by: Don Linnen | 31 March 2018

Cold Heart

“The hardest sin to confess is my pride – my stubbornness and coldness of heart.”

That first sentence in Jack Millers’s devotional for the 20th of March hit me in the gut and made me look at my heart. I’ve wondered in the past if sometimes my heart was too warm or too tender. Never have I wondered if it was too cold.

I look with dismay at others when they make snarky comments about the human condition locally, nationally, or globally. Naturally, only being snarky some of the time, I think I have most things figured out and believe I’m able to admit it when I just don’t know.

I set myself apart from those who only feed their minds – and beliefs – with information that confirms their biases. I define intellectual integrity as the willingness to admit uncertainty, to look at all sides of an issue, and to willingly examine long-held opinions given new evidence.

I claim to be different from those others on the far right and far left of our political divide. Those others who stubbornly dig in their heels and yell loudly at anyone who slightly disagrees with them. I claim intellectual integrity with a certain amount of pride.

As Hamlet said: “Ay, there’s the rub.”

Miller reminded me that “sin makes us inherently self centered and unteachable.” 

Am I self centered? I want my own way. Am I unteachable? I want to be right. I may be embarrassed to be wrong (even unwilling to admit my embarrassment).

Is that why so many tribes are fussing and fuming with each other these days? They’re unwilling to admit they might be wrong? That their leaders are wrong? That their ancestors were wrong?

Am I unwilling to admit I might be wrong. Or am just I proud to not be like “those other” people? 

The hardest sin for me to confess apparently IS my pride – sadly, my stubbornness and coldness of heart.

Looks like I need to add pride to my list of sins – things that displease God.

Sure am glad Jesus died so that our sins can be forgiven.

Sure am glad for Easter.

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